Chat Monday 6 April 1998

Grant, You're back. How was Sydney? Where are the ITA website leaflets? Where is the course summary you were going to submit? I hope you're devoting the time you're not doing these things to Sharon. (That sentence sounds faintly filthy.)Also, where is everybody else? This site has been VERY QUIET for quite a while now. Hasn't anybody got anything to say?How about a joke? My sister just emailed me the following:>> O N E L I N E R S F R O M W O M E N>>>> 1. I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm>> not dumb...and I also know that I'm not blonde. [Dolly Parton]>>>> 2. You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever>> see a smart woman with a dumb guy. [Erica Jong]>>>> 3. I want to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends>> told me she was in labour for 36 hours. I don't even want to do>> anything that feels good for 36 hours. [Rita Rudner]>>>> 4. My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We>> can't decide to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. [Rita Rudner]>>>> 5. I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. [Wendy>> Liebman]>>>> 6. Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. [Erma>> Bombeck]>>>> 7. If high heels were so wonderful, men would be wearing them. [Sue>> Grafton]>>>> 8. I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.>> [Roseanne Barr]>>>> 9. I think -- therefore I'm single. [Lizz Winstead]>>>> 10. "When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men>> invade another country." [Elayne Boosler]>>>> 11. "Behind every successful man is a surprised woman." [Maryon>> Pearson]>>>> 12. "I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch." [Gilda>> Radner]>>>> 13. "In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want>> anything done, ask a woman." [Margaret Thatcher]>>>> 14. "If I were going to convert to any religion I would probably>> choose Catholicism because it at least has female saints and the>> Virgin Mary." [Margaret Atwood]>>>> 15. "I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine>> marriage and a career." [Gloria Steinhem]>>>> 16. "Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry." [Gloria>> Steinhem]>>>> 17. "I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at>> home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which>> growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat>> that comes home late at night." [Marie Corelli]>>>> 18. "Nagging is the repetition of unpalatable truths." [Baroness Edith>> Summerskill]>>>> 19. "If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neckties?>> How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around>> your neck?" [Linda Ellerbee]>>>> 20. "I am a marvellous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep>> his house." [Zsa Zsa Gabor]OK, who can do better?lotsa luv liz