Funny Car Stories - Just for fun :)

Way, way back in the days of the W.A. Police Force's Road Traffic Authority, I was home here in Perth on leave and getting around in my dad's beaten-up old Holden EJ station wagon, heavily loaded with all of his building tools. An old mate of mine was currently employed as a flying instructor with the Bunbury Aero Club and was ferrying a Cessna 172 up to Perth for routine maintenance and it was a good opportunity to catch up with each other. So there I was heading out to Perth Airport in this old jalopy of Dad's, waiting at the traffic lights to make the right-hand turn off of Great Eastern Highway. Right behind me, also waiting to turn, was an R.T.A. vehicle, but I wasn't particularly concerned because as far as I could tell I hadn't done anything wrong.

The lights changed, we both made the turn, and the R.T.A. bloke immediately sounded his siren. Seeing my puzzled look in the rear view mirror, he vigorously motioned with his hand for me to pull over. Well, my first thought was "Oh no, not the R.T.A. . . . those blokes are right ba*tards!"

"Did you indicate to make that turn mate?" He asked.

"I certainly did...mate", I replied a little testily.

"Oh...well perhaps the bulb's blown then", he said, "Lets just check".

Sure enough, the indicator light bulb had chosen that particular morning to expire.

"You know, this old banger doesn't look too appealing and I really ought to give it a good going over to see if there's anything else wrong with it".

"Oh here we go," I thought, "Dad's not going to be happy about this!"

"Is it your vehicle?" he asked.

"No, it's my dad's. I'm just borrowing it" I replied.

"Uh-huh. What are you heading out to the airport for anyway?" he asked.

I thought it was none of his business, but I told him anyway "I'm picking up a flying mate of mine. He's dropping off an aircraft for overhaul"

"And you're a pilot too, I suppose", he said, and I thought I detected a note of sarcasm.

"Ye-e-e-s . . . Why?" I replied cautiously, "Surely you don't want to see my licence. . .?"

His whole demeanour suddenly changed and became very sunny and cheerful. "No no, mate, of course not! It's just I do a bit of flying myself . . . nothing too exciting, mind you but . . . well, you know, brotherhood of the air and all that . . . look, I'll tell you what, I can see it's just a work vehicle and your dad's probably a bit of a battler . . ."

"Yeah well, you know how it is", I quickly interjected, seizing the chance.

"I do mate, I do" he said, "My old man's self employed too . . . self UNemployed he calls it! Look, there's a petrol station just up here on the right . . . you can pick up a new bulb there."

"Thanks mate, I will", I replied with some relief.

"You know, this reminds me of an Irish joke", he said, and I could hardly believe my ears . . . this WAS an R.T.A. copper, after all.

"Yeah, see . . . Paddy says to Mick 'Can you just hop out and check my rear indicator light for me?', so Mick gets out of the car, goes to the back and says 'Okay, try it now'. Paddy flicks the lever and calls out 'Is it working?' Mick calls back 'I'm not sure . . . now it's working . . . now it's not . . . now it's working . . . now it's not!'

And the copper dissolved into fits of laughter.

"Ha ha ha, good one mate!" I humoured him. I didn't have the heart to tell him I'd heard it before.

"Have a great day, won't you mate" he said sunnily, heading back to his car, "And you won't forget about that bulb, will you?"

"I won't, mate . . . Thanks very much. You have a great day too . . . see you!"

I wonder what that copper's doing now . . .

Per Ardua Ad Astra