empty feeling

i don't even know why i'm writing this but i do know that being at the tender age of 15, I have to think, what do I want to be? When thinking this i think, what do I like? First things to come to mind are, Drama and Philosophy. I want to act. In theatre, movie, commercials whatever, but i wonder what's my chance of getting there? there are so many talented people out there and i don't know if i am as good as they are. What if i'm just wasting my time trying? I mean, i get good grades and stuff, so do you reckon i should i do something like law? maybe i should go for uni and get a PhD.
what's the point of this? not really much except exactly how hard it is to be 15... or maybe i just think that and being 15 isn't hard at all... or maybe, just maybe i should go and see a psychiatrist.



reading this it seems that this has nothing to do with theatre... so i'm sorry for those who know hate me.

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Do you think you're just under pressure? I think everyone's there from year 10 onwards. We have to choose the subjects that we want to study for the next 2 years, which will affect up to the next 30 years or so of our life (I know ppl change profession, but not everyone).

I think maybe as long as you enjoy what you're doing (and you're not living below the poverty line), you're not wasting your time. Sure, you may not be able to go professional or full-time or whatever, but you meet great people who are really talented.

Don't do stuff you absolutely hate, that bores you to tears. Then you may need to go see a psych later on.

I don't see why anyone should hate you. I'd say 80% of teenagers or even adults have been at this point. If this is the only place you feel you can say that - go for it! People don't have to read every post. You're a lot more real, and way less pretentious than many ppl around your age.

Jess

God I'm glad someone else out there feels these things!

This web page does alert you to just how many very ambitious and extremely talented people there are out there.
And once you realise how much competition there is around you start to wonder "Is it worth the bother? what if I'm never any good?"

But you gotta ask yourself- Do you REALLY want it?
If you think you might, go for it! if it doesnt work out at least we tried right?
WRONG! we feel like crap, and we resent other peoples success.

Hey I'm honest ok? If I'm helpful thats just a bonus! :P

But go for it anyway.

I'm not that much older than you and every time I ring around about auditions I feel as nervous as hell.
But right now its what I want more than anything and unless something else comes along I'm stuck with it.

You dont have to decide about your whole life right now, but if you start attending auditions and getting yourself known around the place I reckon youve got as good a chance as any of us.

Dont stress! And Good Luck!

It's just over 20 years ago, when I was choosing my subjects for Yr 11 & 12...and I really remember the pressure everyone seemed to be under to 'get it right' and basically choose the direction the rest of your life was going to head in.
I had NO IDEA what I really wanted to do, and I simply did subjects that kept my options open...thinking maybe I'd get into teaching(?) but not really feeling that I wanted to be a teacher (so thank god I didn't!). I discovered acting as a hobby around the end of year 11, and that soon influenced most of my future choices, like the major I chose at Uni...although I don't think I really ever considered acting would become my job. It kinda just happened because I really liked it and got good at it, and I left Uni midway and have never really looked back.
There were plenty of my mates, all intelligent guys, who did top maths and science subjects (because everyone else was doing it), got into first year Engineering (because everyone else was doing it), dropped out within a year and went to work for a bank (because everyone else was doing it)...and kind of disappeared after that.

I remember thinking at the time that these guys were all expected to succeed, but virtually no one was following a path they WANTED to...I really seemed to be turning off the beaten track there. Turned out to be one of my proudest achievements, although I didn't consciously decide it...I think I was just really lucky to have found something I liked and been brave enough just to have a good go at it. But if someone had told me what I was doing at the time, it might have freaked me out a bit.


As it turns out, all that decision making we had to do at the end of Yr 10...well there's no reason why it couldn't have been made later. I'm not saying it's not important, and if you CAN make those decisions early, you're probably at an advantage....but here's the thing: you can change your mind! It's not life-threatening if you don't make the right decision, or even don't make a decision. All those guys I mentioned, they must have made new decisions after realising following the pack wasn't right for them, and are probably doing well wherever they are now.
So if you can understand you don't have to feel pressure about making a bad decision (because you can always change your mind)...there's nothing to stop you just having a go at something and seeing where it takes you. I thoroughly recommend finding something you like and are good at, but don't stress if it takes a while to find it. And in the meantime, ANYTHING you have a go at will provide you with experience you can draw upon as an actor.
I once had another job, which I loved. I qualified as a scuba instructor. And the interesting thing about that was, I had failed my science subjects at school. I hated them and couldn't see much point. But later, when I discovered a use that was fun and interesting, it didn't take me long to study what I needed to know to be able to teach others about physics, gas laws, and human biology related to scuba. So it didn't matter that I hadn't chosen those subjects in upper highschool...later, when I changed my mind, it was easy and fun to learn.


I guess my point is that from about your mid-teens it all feels pretty stressful...but you'll learn to cope. Actually, as a 35 year old it still often feels pretty stressful, and in some ways I feel no different from when I was 15...the difference is just that I'm more used to it now, and I can look back and think 'Why did I let the pressure get to me then?' I've had plenty of chances to make new decisions along the way, and they've always worked out in the end, mainly because I've found stuff I LIKED to do.

It sometimes feels like the pressure's on when you see young people like Heath Ledger or Russell Crowe (when he WAS younger) becoming successful, and you start to think, 'Well, what chance have I got?' But there are a lot of examples like Bryan Brown, or Harrison Ford, who didn't start a serious career until much later in life, after doing other things like carpentry. It's never too late, and you can always change your mind.


Of course, if you DID leave school and go straight to Hollywood like Mr Ledger, I guess you'd be pretty happy....


Hang in there!
Cheers,
Craig

Hello Dilan I would just like to say...

You CAN change your mind. Its (As craig said) not life threatening. No one hates,u, everyone gos through it, you just have to deal with it. I hope this helps.
Regards
Abby Nicole

It's only been five (omigod, five years!) since I graduated from school. I got good grades, but by mid-year 12 I knew I wanted to do tech. I started hunting around all the drama courses. I applied for 2, one at Swinburne and one at VCA. Unfortunately, I didn't know about certain interview requirements for Swinburne and didn't even get the opportunity to audition. I did audition for VCA, but they obviously thought I was too young - rightly so.

So I ended up doing a Bachelor of Arts, just a plain bachelor, with history, sociology, philosophy and linguistics. I hated it! I knew no one in my course (with a student body of a few hundred it's easy not to know anyone) and didn't make any friends. Mainly because I was soooooo bored that I skipped half my classes, and kept to myself.

For the whole year, I was determined to either drop the course, or transfer into a drama one. Well, I applied again for VCA and Swinburne, and got into Swinburne. It was the best thing I ever did!

My suggestion DilanMelis, is to go for it! The great thing about these drama courses, is that they let you know whether you really want to do it. If you drop out, hate it, or come away with the thought 'I don't want to be an actor,' then the course has been useful. You'd be surprised how many people believe they want to be actors (or stars) and then get involved and realise it's too hard. Or that it would suit them better as a hobby, rather than a career.

I'm not saying that you will come out feeling like you hopes and dreams will be smashed, I'm just saying that this is a perfect way to find out whether you really want to do it or not. And if you do, then you've done the course, got the piece of paper, and you can try and become a professional actor. But if you don't want to do it, at least you can say, 'I tried, and you know what, it's not for me.'

For those who really want to become a professional, doing a course is the best way to not only get experience and contacts, but provides you with a better understanding of what you want to do with it. You may decide not to become an actor, but a writer, or a designer... don't think you have to make a decision so quickly. Five years out of school, and two years out of my course, I did another short course by correspondence - this is still in the arts area, but will help with the finances.

And finally, don't freak out too much about 'deciding' what you want to do - these days most people don't know until they're doing it! Most of all, a degree these days is almost essential for a job (or at least one not at a fast food joint) and having a degree or a second job will be essential when you want to start working in the arts industry - so while you're trying to make up your mind about the acting, look into several career options and pick one that you're not absolutely going to hate. Then work your way into the job that you love.

And good luck!

Compleatly agree. Do you DilanMelis?

Wow, I didn't think that there would be anyone replying to this post.
It gives me a nice tingle to think that there are others that are going or already been through this sort of thing and that they have the kindness to give others the advice and help to others who haven't quite gotten there.

I see a new 'light' as you might say, and am thinking that, yes, you know what I'm going to do it... I'm going to be exactly what I want to be and be the best that I can be, not what everyone else wants to be or whatever's going to be seem better as a future prospect.

So, thank you all, for giving me the help and advice that gave me the 'push' to continue on with life normally without stressing as much.

Best regards,
DilanMelis

p.s- this sort of thing makes us who haven't made it there yet have new hope... Please every now and then put posts up like this to make us feel better... THANK YOU AGAIN!!!

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