All things must pass

There I was, on my annual trial. Her eyes fixed me with her customary steely gaze. For a moment her eyes bored into mine, before being lowered slowly to gaze with scant interest at the A4 sheets lying prostrate on her desk. I sensed her trying to find some logic in the numbers, which given her occupation, led me to believe that I'd made a huge mistake in employing this woman as my accountant. I readied myself for the inevitable question. I'd gone over the line time and time again. I promised myself that on this occassion, I wouldn't stumble and dribble a pathetic response. No this time; I would meet her eyes, and respond manfully. The question came.... Her: 'Johnny, can you tell me with some confidence, that A lad in sane will make money next year?' Me: 'Well, I err, think there is a chance, an outside, sort of long shot sort of desperate hope that it we will in the least make some people happy, and in doing so, this may prompt them to throw wads of money our way so we can move on up to the next level or at least the one below that. Her: (Long drawn out sigh.) Johnny... Me: Yes! (Hopeful intonation.) Her: In a lad in sane's case, the next level would have you in the dungeon. Me: Well, yeah, but dungeons are really cool places to hang out, or so I'm led to believe... Her: Do you want my advice? Me: Is it free? Her: Do I look like the owner of a theatre company that loses money every year? Me: Hey, don't beat about the bush, tell me what you really think! Her: I think it's time you accepted the fact. Me: That fact being? Her: You'd be insane* to continue operating a business that continues to lose money every year. You've had fun Johnny, but it's time for the fun to end. You're not getting any younger. If your hair continues to recede at the rate it is, you won't have any hair on your arse, let alone your back. It's time to think sensibly. Me: One question. Her: Yes. Me: Are there any self help books on how to think sensibly? Her: Oh yes! In fact I have written one myself, you can have a personally signed copy for $99.00. Me: $99.00 plus the $380.00 you're charging me to tell me I should close the very thing that sustains my being? Her: Sensibility at a super cheap price, and you know what's even better? Me: What? Her: You can claim it as a tax deduction next year. Me: Can you wipe that smile off your face? Her: For a price...... And so it is, that in the interest of sensibility, that A lad in sane productions must depart the local theatre scene. In closing the doors on the theatre we don't have; I'd like to offer my sincere thanks to the many who've joined us along the way. Special thanks to Norma Davis, Hywel Williams, Tim Prosser, Peter Nettleton, Gordon The Optom, Tony Clarke and the wonderful crew who make up the Phoenix Theatre. It's been fun, it's been expensive (that was the accountant, not me),at times it's been HUGE! ALIS did everything that was asked of her, and more. Of course, I refuse to go away, be buggered if i'm going to give up that easily. There's a degree of nobility in pauperism...and besides writing is cheap, some who've seen my material may suggest that's something of an oxymoron. cheers Johnny Grim A lad in sane productions 2006-2011